I swear
Whem our son arrived home from work, he offered to take me on a walk up the hill behind their house. Although they are not far from the steel works, they are also surrounded by hills, so as long as you don't look in this direction....

... it's a very pleasant location and not far from the sea.
Anyway, quite how I did it, I don't know because I'm normally pretty sure-footed, but one minute I was following M up a narrow path and the next minute I was on my back in the undergrowth on the steep slope below the path thinking, "Eeek! Am I going to roll right down the hill and be seriously injured!"
Fortunately my body, completely of its own volition, had decided that the best strategy was to be flat, limp and spreadeagled and as flat, limp things don't roll very well and as there was a lot of undergrowth, I didn't roll anywhere, just lay like a stranded starfish.
This wasn't the stupid thing, this was merely careless. I'd trodden on what looked like the edge of the path, but which was actually just overhanging matted vegetation and so my foot had gone from under me.
No, what was stupid was scrambling back onto the path, dusting myself off and saying, "Oh, I'm fine!" and walking for another mile and a half, quite briskly, up the rest of the hill and then down to the fish and chip shop. Of course what I should have said was, "I seem to have wrenched some muscles in my leg, I think I should go back and rest it." (I post this partly as a service to any of my readers who might want to incapacitate a fictional character temporarily. I was perfectly capable of climbing the hill, though the downhill at the end was painful.)
Well, by the time I'd reached M's house and sat for a while eating the fish and chips, the leg had stiffened and I've been hopping lame since. Fortunately, it's just one particular set of muscles that's been strained (down the outside of the leg) and it can't be all that bad because it's neither bruised nor swollen. Fortunately it isn't the set of muscles needed to operate the clutch. I checked that just now by bringing the car round to the front of our son's house, ready to load my stuff and head off for my daughter's.
So the plan for sightseeing today has been drastically curtailed. I am about to have lunch and then find a museum or castle I can totter around for a few hours before turning up at my daughter's house where I will be until Sunday.