Helen (heleninwales) wrote,

  • Mood:

So far so good

I gave up on the workbook and decided that as I was getting nowhere fast with it, I'd leave a bit early. I toddled over to the admin block to return the amendment to my contract to personnel and then set off home. The amendment was to reduce my hours slightly. This means that instead of full-time, I'm on a .8 contract and thus will only work 4 days per week from now on. Also, in the weeks I do evening classes, it means that I'll be able to finish at 1.00 pm on Fridays. Obviously, it'll mean a bit less money, but we can cope with that. Time is currently more valuable. Whoopee! More writing time!

I then drove home (listening to music instead of the news and current affairs programme that's on the radio at that time). Once home I:

  • cleared the dirty dishes into the dishwasher
  • washed the things that aren't dishwasher proof
  • made bread
  • cleaned out the rats.

This is unprecedented. So perhaps there's something in this theory about calming your thoughts to reduce depression. I've never before had the energy to do stuff after getting home on a Friday night. Usually it's just onto the computer to read e-mails, cook dinner, eat dinner with glass of wine and slump with husband in front of TV for the rest of the evening.

For some time, I've been suspecting that I suffer from mild chronic depression, which occasionally slumps into a true depression for a while, before sliding back up into a state that doesn't appear depressed, but in which I have little mental energy. The best way to describe it is that it feels as though I'm driving with the handbrake on all the time.

Of course today may just be a fluke, tomorrow the energy level may have sagged again, but I'm going to continue the experiment and see what happens.


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